What it is?

Resilience is your personal 'power to bounce back', for example after a fall, a mistake, a failure, a rejection, a relationship split up or an unwanted health diagnosis. What kind of shape is your ability to 'bounce back' in?

For gay and bisexual and men and men who have sex with men 'coming out', dealing with homophobia, finding, developing and consolidating supportive relationships and managing various health issues provides ample opportunities to develop resiliency.

What does being resilient feel like?

As human beings, we already possess resiliency. However, it can ebb and flow depending on the varying mix of factors affecting us at any given time. We don’t always feel resilient all the time, but even small amounts of the following can help pull us through the most challenging of events:

  • being 'centered' in yourself (i.e. high self-esteem)
  • establishing good boundaries and being 'kindly tough' with others
  • having good sensory awareness
  • being present and future orientated rather than focused on the past
  • being more flexible in trying out different responses to problems
  • giving purpose and meaning to your life
  • being self-disciplined
  • taking defeats on the chin
  • enjoying healthy nurturing relationships
  • being able to accept your limitations
  • being able to forgive
  • being skilled at managing conflicts.

How do I develop Resilience?

Through trial and error we have all learned to bounce back from challenging events. However, sometimes our resilience strategy may not work as well for a particular situation and we need the temporary help of others (friends, family & professionals) to support us through certain problematic life events.

Using both guided 'self-help' strategies and support from others when appropriate can be an effective way to develop and maintain resiliency.

Where can I get help?

For times when you just need to build on an existing skill you already have, or develop a new resourceful way to respond, the team at the Steve Retson Project can help you acquire the skills you need to enhance your ability to bounce back.

Have a look at our Services page for more information.